Truth Memoirs

God is more interested in me reaching my earthly destination than he is in me having a comfortable life. I grew up understanding that God's interest in humanity is to serve us and make life comfortable.But my personal experience in the last few years seems to suggest otherwise a lot has gone wrong in my life despite my best efforts. None of my prayers have been answered, instead things have gone from bad to worse. As a matter of fact it seems the harder I try to get closer to God the worse my situation gets. This has obviously left me discouraged and doubting my faith, but as I reflected on the crucifixion of Jesus Christ I realized that I feel the way I feel because my understanding of God is misguided and unbiblical. The purpose for Jesus’s crucifixion was not only to die for our sins but it was also meant to demonstrate to us God’s interest in us while we are on the earth. EARTHLY DESTINY God’s interest in us is to restore us to be who he has originally created us to be.He crea...

I had been taught that the Christian journey is about focusing on going to heaven. But I then observed that in the bible Jesus speaks a lot more about the Kingdom of God than he speaks about heaven. It has also become clear to me that the Kingdom of God and Heaven are not the same thing. The Kingdom of God is a colony of Heaven on earth. This means access to the Kingdom of God is available here on earth whereas access to heaven is only available after time on earth. It is therefore my conviction that God’s will for his children is to prioritize the Kingdom of God over Heaven because of the following reasons  God's purpose on earth is fulfilled God’s purpose on earth is to influence the world through his children, but this can only happen when they are in alignment with his Son Jesus Christ. When God’s children prioritize his Kingdom they effectively activate the process of aligning themselves with Jesus Christ enabling God to fulfill his purpose of impacting the world through them....

I recently watched a series on Showmax titled - The VOW. It is a documentary that follows the experiences of people deeply involved in the self-improvement group NXIVM, an organization under siege with charges including sex trafficking and racketeering conspiracy brought against its highest members and founder Keith Ranier.  I previously held very harsh views against people who have fallen victims of cults but after watching this documentary I have learnt not to be quick to judge, because the story of the victims in this documentary could have easily been my story. The people narrating their experiences in this documentary are good people with sober habits. They were looking to find meaning and purpose for their lives, a journey I believe we should all embark on, because when we find our life purpose we are then well positioned to make an impact in our society and communities.I am currently on a journey of self discovery and that is why I can identify with them and watching their s...

I recently recieved an email invite to an event titled Signs of Christ’s return. It was a free event but I chose to ignore the invitation because the subject is a turnoff for me. I am generally not interested in teachings or anything to do with identifying the signs of Christ’s return or signs for the end of times. The reason I have this attitude towards this subject is that when I was in primary school we had a teacher who in her effort to teach us about the Gospel spent a lot of time telling us about the end of times and the consequences for us if we do not repent. I don't know which church she belonged to but they seemed to have a lot of graphic literature about the end of times.She happily shared those books with us and they left me traumatized. I still remember to this day how I felt reading the books then as if it was yesterday. When I got to high school I joined the Student Christian Movement(SCM) because it offered me refuge from the ‘initiation ritual’ which was done to n...

When I was still a member of a denominational church, going to a church service was a tick box exercise for me because I believed God blesses us when we observe religious rituals like regular church attendance and I did not want to miss out on God’s blessings. Another ritual which I observed fellow denominational church members perform was fasting during Easter, this is one religious ritual I never participated in because I could not find anyone to convincingly explain to me why this was done.  The other reason I did not participate in this ritual was that most of those who participated were committed to change during the period of fasting only.They would go back to their old ways immediately afterwards, so my observation was that this ritual did not have a lasting impact. Nevertheless I admired those who participated in it every year, because even though I could not see any physical impact on how this has changed them I believed they have positioned themselves well to receive God’...

Closed doors are the reason I started  my journey of faith in Christ. Life did not get better. The closed doors did not open after committing my life to God. As a matter of fact things got worse for me to a point that  I am worse off financially now than I was before I started on this journey.  My situation got so bad that people close to me and those watching my life from the sidelines have questioned whether God is in my story or have I been misled. Some have asked me this directly but I am sure everyone who knows my current situation is wondering the same thing. I must admit I have been wondering the same thing lately ,as a result  I have been feeling discouraged and starting to doubt my faith until I heard  our Pastor who was teaching about walking in wisdom say “God does not lead us by open doors He leads us by his Word”. This stayed with me for the rest of the service. I don't remember anything else that was said. These words stuck with me and I was encour...

An empty vessel makes the most noise is a very popular proverb which means those with the least wisdom or knowledge are always the most talkative. God created us in his image so that we can be the vessels through which his purpose on the earth is fulfilled. Empty vessels are most preferred for God’s purpose on the earth. This does not mean God prefers us when we are most talkative without wisdom. It actually means the opposite.. SELFISH DESIRES God’s plan for us after Salvation is that we can be his vessels that display his glory by impacting the lives of others. This is only possible when we sacrifice our own desires for the benefit of others i.e. becoming a living sacrifice.  Sacrificing our own desires for the benefit of others is not our default setting, we are born selfish with only one goal in mind to prioritize our selfish desires above everything else. The bible tells us that our selfish desires are hostile to the will of God, it is therefore necessary for God to take us th...

A few years ago I bought a book that was recommended by a book club at the local Anglican Church where I was a member. The book was inspirational in fact I recently read the book again and I still found it relevant. This book was naturally a Christian book and the author kept referring to instances where God spoke to him. When the author made these references where God spoke to him it made me feel uneasy because where I come from not much was said about hearing the voice of God. I don’t remember hearing a testimony or the Preacher telling us about a conversation he/she had with God indicating that they can hear God. We were also never taught how to discern the voice of God so I assumed that God no longer speaks today to individuals as he spoke in the bible days he only speaks through specially selected people. This assumption raised other questions for me, for instance if God no longer speaks today how am I supposed to know his purpose for my life? Who are these people selected to hear...

I have always admired religious people with the following characteristics: Efficient with church rules and regulations – In the Anglican Church there is an Anglican prayer book which is used to navigate various church services depending on the occasion. There were people I knew at church who knew this book inside out, they knew which page to turn even before the Priest announced it, they even knew the Hymn numbers off by heart and they also knew when to stand and when to sit down. This started bothering me when I started seeing people my age and sometimes younger than me mastering this book. It bothered me because clearly I was not paying enough attention in the church to which I belonged all my life. Regular church goers – I went to church fairly regularly but sometimes golf or some other activity would get in the way of church but I knew some people who would never allow anything getting in the way of church they would schedule their Sundays around church. They were also very active...

In our country whenever there is a disaster our government and church leaders will declare a specific day for prayer. These days of prayer are never declared when there is a reason for the country to celebrate, so this made me associate prayer with times of need. In other words I thought prayer is only necessary when I am in a crisis. I also had never personally experienced God answering any of my prayers as I wanted them or when I wanted them answered and I have also seen one too many people who have prayed to God for their loved ones to be healed but instead of healing they would die. So this was confusing because I have always believed that the purpose of prayer is to make God fulfil my wish list. I now realize that my concept about prayer was misguided, because prayer is not about making God do my will and it is not only necessary in times of crisis.   Higher version of myself The primary purpose of the gospel is salvation and the secondary purpose for the gospel is so that Go...

When I first started my journey of faith in Christ I was excited because of the new way I was seeing God but I could also be tunnel visioned when I am excited about something as a result a lot of well meaning people in my life advised me to find a healthy balance between spirituality and the reality of life I struggled with this concept of balance because I did not understand how to make it work practically. My intention is to go for everything that God has planned for my life, so this concept seemed to mean there are things of God I needed to compromise to find this balance.  It is still a struggle for me to live out this balance but at least now I know that I am struggling with it  because it is not possible to find a happy medium between the spiritual being and the natural being in me. Here is why. Body, Soul and Spirit Humans are made of body, soul and spirit, with the body we perceive the natural realities, with our soul the link between the natural being and the spiritua...

There are a lot of church denominations in the Christian faith with differing opinions and sometimes direct opposite opinions about God. Trying to learn all different denominations to try and figure out who is right and who is wrong could be a nightmare. I imagine this is one of the reasons a lot of people are staying away from church or they are holding on to the church denomination they were brought up in. I also did not bother doing research until personal circumstances forced my hand because  It seemed very convenient to stick to the church denomination I was brought up in.  Even if I wanted to rock the boat and ask questions I did not know anyone who was objective enough to answer my questions without being biased to their own preference of denomination. I did not want to open myself up to false prophets who will make me drink petrol or fleece me of my money as I have seen happen to other people. So why does a sovereign God allow so much confusion about him among his peop...

Seeking the truth about God could be a challenge considering that he is defined differently by people depending on their religious beliefs. These varying beliefs exist inside and outside the Christian faith. Within the Christian faith itself there is no uniformity on the definition of his character or how we should be interacting with him.  Adding to the confusion is African spirituality, this might not mean anything to you if you are not African and black, but if you are African and  black and you do not observe African spirituality you are considered anti black in some quarters. So as a black person African spirituality is a reality to contend with when searching for the truth. These varying opinions can be intimidating and overwhelming for someone seeking the truth. It is a lot easier to stay with what you were brought up with instead of taking this confusing journey of searching for the truth yourself. I know that was the case for me until life circumstances pushed me...

Earlier in my life I came across the practice of meditation which was based on the premise that the superpower we need to achieve anything lies within us. To access this superpower we must dig deeper.This meditation practice was recommended as a  tool to help access this superpower. I practiced this meditation for some time but it did not bear the expected results for me ,instead I was left feeling very frustrated and inadequate. Sadghuru (an Indian yoga guru and proponent of spirituality very popular on YouTube) through his teachings advocates for this  self-reliance as well instead of relying on an invisible God. In a conversation about Sadghuru I was recently asked  Why do we need God if all the superpower we need is within us?. Indeed we have within us the superpower to achieve success but accessing it without God leads to distraction here is why. Spiritual realm vs Natural realm God is spirit and he exists in the spiritual realm even though all creation in both the s...